( to be read in the style of a retired colonel, ie Disgusted of Tonbridge Wells, writing to the 'Times')
Sir,
I must bring it to your attention that I, and others hereabout, consider that there has been some irregularity in the voting patterns of some states which enabled the bloody Ruskies to romp home victorious in last nights Eurovision Song Competition.
It would appear that the Ruskies, in effect, bought their way to this honour, the countries voting most for their pathetic dirge being made up of ex Soviet Bloc States and other boot lickers.
I do not know what favours were curried or what had been promised but I rest assured and sleep easy in my bed at night knowing that such buying of honours can never exist in this country.
Why you may as well say that you could buy your way to a Peerage or Knighthood, just by making donations to a political party or by performing some useful task. Thank Christ we here in Blighty will not abase ourslves like Johny Foreigner.
Tis but a Pyric Victory after all.
Dennypoos........................soon to be blogging under the monicker, 'Flummoxed of Freemantle'