Hell&related Stuff

Whilst out yesterday on my photographic expedition, I came across this novel bit of parking.

The bit that amused me was the sticker on the back of the van which gave out a phone no. so that you could report incidences of GOOD driving.

Rude not to really and so I left an appropriate message on their answer-machine.

Dennypoos..............full to the brim with bonhommie.

..has meant that I have been able to do today what I didn't manage yesterday. Vis. My walk along 'The Solent Way'. The photos I was going to improve upon, well, that didn't really work out but there were some other good'uns. I'll post a link to these when I straighten out the horizons in loads of them as at the moment many of them seem to be suitable only for Irish water skiers. Here's an unaltered, non tarted up one to give you a taster.

click on picture to enlarge.

So that's me completely knackered and as soon as the kettle has boiled and I am in possesion of a mug of tea and a slab of cake, I shall resume the Arse/Sofa interface situation.

Dennypoos................fifteen miles and fucked, what a state to be in.

So yesterday was the first real opportunity I had to alter the Sofa/arse interface and get back to what I laughingly call normal.
Photo Shoot! Yes! This brilliant idea involves a bit of a trek, some thought and a smidgen of technical expertise.

I had in mind where I wanted to go and this was to re-shoot in an area I had already had some success with but felt there was more to be had. So. I checked the weather forecast. My google home page's widget looked like an shiny Orange, though cold. The BBC 24hr forecast was similarly optimistic. The Met office was also giving me the yellow globe for the entire day.

How was it then that when dawn broke it was cloudy and dull?

How was it that it took till lunchtime for there to be the merest hint of a shadow?

How was it that when I got to the scene of what would have been 'my triumphant session', the sun was obscured by cloud cover in the west though the sky above was as blue as a Jim Davidson joke?

How bloody come?

Dennypoos...........Seaweed and Pine Cones to be collected.

Following on from misguided and pre-emptive New Years resolutions, (not mine own I hasten to add), here's a little Richard Thompson.

...no dear readers not Bullshit as you may have thought. I have never actually been full of bullshit as 'bollocks' takes up too much room.
No, I am full of bonhomie and goodwill, blah-blah as I have rediscovered an old friend. Well truth to tell she rediscovered me via the 'Geograph' site.
Deborah MacKinnon by name, seemingly Scottish but actually a little Dorset dumpling, (that'll cut short our renewed friendship). Almost eighteen years or thereabouts since we last talked and now I'm email rich. No more sending money to Nigeria in order to have friends. No more 469 scams to play the dopey mark with. If only I could find those photographs I took of her when we lived in Weymouth. Her in her riding gear. Me not. Not having ever ridden a horse.

Dennypoos.......................has re-found the originator of his own soubriquet.

You're going to endorse a product, do it like this.

Dennypoos..............a blinding light in the shadows.

I had come, finally some might say, to the belief that Christmas was without meaning. That all it stood for was naught. That things, and people had lost sight of what was what. Then, midst the depths of a despair so deep it could only be mine own, I found that I was making a preemptive strike against Christmasdom, for lo, 'Bridge on the river Kwai' was on TV. Admittedly it was E4 or more4, but nonetheless my faith was restored.
I just need to find 'The great escape' and all will be well with the world.

Dennypoos......................a faith restored.

Those, who like myself were a little underwhelmed by 'Doctor Who', with it's pathetic storey-line and emphasis on special effects. Those who may be concerned as to David Tennant's career prospects can reassure themselves that though he may well be in the process of being regenerated, he can always return to his previous home in Rab C Nesbit's boozer.

Dennypoos..............concerned with the 'soon to be' unemployed.

So farewell then Eartha Kitt
You got on my mum's tits.
My father thought you absurd
as you strutted and preened and purred.
To me a strange odd woman
but you surely got me hummin,
dada-dada-dada-dada,
dada-dada-dada-dada, Batman!

...... and thats a bloody order.

Rab C Nesbitt is having a one off tonight and for those of you who have, either never been to Scotland, or have never seen the series, or dispute that I am the TV taste guru, just watch and see.

Dennypoos............a reminder of all that is good in this sceptred isle.

...Not flavour of the month but without doubt a good writer and performer. I refer to Bruce Springsteen as can be seen here ont Youtube.

http://uk.youtube.com/watch?v=1dfKdk6d6yQ

Dennypoos..............impeccable taste as ever.

If the Bank of England didn't understand what was /is happening to the economy, what the hell chance do we poor inhabitants of 'This sceptered Isle' have?

http://news.bbc.co.uk/1/hi/business/7794604.stm

Dennypoos.........who's chances of getting back into employment are reducing day by day.

Bloody hell!....I'll repeat that for the hard of reading,,,BLOODY HELL. It's twenty years since the Locherbie 'disaster'. Where has it gone?

Following a confab with frankofyle, I feel I should inform a waiting populace that twas in Southampton that King Canute did his famous party piece to give a salutary warning to his courtiers and general hangers on.

click on image to enlarge.

Dennypoos..............wonders if they got a room with a sea view?

Not my favourite person but a nice, (if that's the word), parody.

Dennypoos...........available for an early morning chuckle.

..people use trite, hackneyed words or phrases instead of constructing sentances.

Examples that currently are to the fore are

Absolutely. Why not just say yes.

Very much so. Why not just say absolutely.

But my number one bete noir is:

Steep learning curve. Sometimes the twat misusing this descriptive phrase doesn't even go for steep.

I am amused from time to time by, when confronted by this phrase, to ask, "How do you mean?" I am then confronted by a blank expresionless stare.

For a more complete definition try:

http://en.wikipedia.org/wiki/Learning_curve

Dennypoos.................Arsey but educational.

DONT EAT THE MINCE PIES!!!!!!!!!!!!!

Well, I say don't eat the mince pies, what I actually mean is:

It is illegal to eat mince pies on Christmas day. In a law brought in by that laugh a minute man, Oliver Cromwell in 1657, it is illegal to eat mince pies on Chrissy day.
It has never apparantly been repealed.

To find other oddities just google 'strange laws' and you will find that there are truck-loads of sites that have a few examples. Could'nt find a definitive site though.

Dennypoos....................the afternoon drags on.

I do not thankfully refer to a ' dicky ticker' brought on by age but to the fact that I am enjoying a daytime TV programme. Those more astute will have worked out that I mean 'Heartbeat', the 60's police drama set in Yorkshire. The watching of such a programme would surely be a harbinger for the onset of senility but not so my petit pois. The thing is that during the car chases or sweeping views o'wer hill and vale they play music from the period. Early Stones, mucho merseybeat stuff etc. I have to report however that yesterday they messed up by playing The Who's "Wont get fooled again", a tune from the 70's.

Yes not much on at the 'mo in the Dennypoos household.

Dennypoos.....................still unable to access my pen function on't new computer. Biting the bullet and admitting defeat, vis a vis sorting it myself.

Even Santa can feel a little let down by the run up to Christmas.

click on image to enlarge.

Dennypoos...................not the only one who feels a bit deflated.

Denny's Supper rooms is pleased to announce that Chef has mastered the poaching of eggs as can be seen from last nights supper.

Smoked Haddock, a few dressed leaves, thinly sliced chorizo,topped with poached eggs and two rashers of crispy bacon.

Dennypoos........................would make an excelent house husband to a stinking rich 40 something lady.

So the new laptop/tablet has arrived and all is not completely well. The idea of the tablet is in ease of use when editing photographs and this is what I used my previous, now dead, machine for.
The problem is in using the pen/stylus, insomuch as it doesn't work. The chances are that it is me just being a dopey twat and that it needs to be 'enabled'. I am however buggered if I can find where to do this. I've just about worn out the control panel>devices> add hardware/drivers>pointers etc. I think Monday a few phone calls will be made, suffice it to say I can get nowhere with Toshiba's support centre. Ho-hum. Still here's a picture of the damn thing in the meantime.

Dennypoos..............not quite there yet.

In a comment I made on someone else's posting a couple of days ago I said,

"There are times when facts can be the greatest enemy of truth".

This seemed to cause a bit of consternation, was disputed and I was asked to provide an example of this seemingly ludicrous statement. So without further ado, here is but one example:

When I look in the mirror, in the morning whilst shaving, the fact is that the person I see, (whom is undoubtedly me) is left handed.

The truth is that I am right handed.

Dennypoos..............................will always answer his critics.

And before you start, No, I haven't lost my marbles. In fact I haven't had any marbles since I was ten years old, which may explain a lot.
 What I mean is can the computer remember what you were doing and then act upon it, by comitting Hari-Kari, for example?
I ask this question for a reason and that is that my trusty Toshiba laptop appears to have done just that. 

Picture the scene, if you will, a frustrated Dennypoos is grinding his teeth,(yes they're still all my own), over the amount of time it's taking for my machine to edit a batch of photographs and upload them to one of my sites. So, thoroughly pised off as I am  by this that I look on a couple of web sites to see about a replacement.
 Gosh haven't things come on a lot. I can get a machine with three times the hard drive capacity, mega quick core two duo processor for less than half the price I paid for my old tosh three years ago and even then I got it seriously cheap off eBay.

I pretty well made up my mind to get myself a pressy. Today, after watching and then copying a film to DVD, I went on to the web-site I looked at to see if the machine was in stock, place an order, arrange delivery etc and then.........without so much as a 'by your leave' or 'fuck you then Jimmy' the laptop ceased working, just stopped, blank screen with vertical stripes, see pic:

I have, of course, used all my powers to get the damn thing to boot. Re-instalation disk, reading the manual, going online etc but to no avail. I even thought about using the American method of ' Baseball bat technology', but I don't have a baseball bat, so I leapt on the machine from the arm of the Sofa. Nada. So the question remains. Is this mere coincidence or are they really watching us? Dennypoos..................in mourning until DHL 24hr service arrives..........whoo-hoo!

I initially thought of my favourite cemetery, with frosty grave stones and rimed Creeping Ivy. It just wasn't hapening so I went to a part of town that I don't usually frequent, being the Marina, trendy eateries and lush appartment area. Amazing what you can find  when you open your eyes.

click on image to enlarge.

There were many more but I've just realised that being a prat I've uploaded the full file not a dinky blog one and as such have run out of space.

...and it's bloody frosty.

So I'm away out with the camera.

Seen, and isn't everything odd, in Southampton.

Good bark definition though.

click on image to enlarge.

.... not content with trying to get us to buy his Judo DVD for Christmas, it would appear that Vladimir Putin, ex Russian numero uno, (and still the power behind the throne) is attempting to de-rail our festive season by luring us into drunkenness with his own brand Vodka.

Now I don't see the alcohol as the problem, (though lord knows I should), no my concern is with the plutonium isotope contained therein.

Dennypoos......................your very own watchdog.

...but I just like the whole concept.

...bummer.

I'm not refering to those fools, yes fools, who were stupid enough to take out motgages for more than the value of their property. No, not them.

I am not refering to those persons who now have to shop at Aldi and Lidl as opposed to Sainsburys & Waitrose. No not them.

I refer to the demise of companies, many of them household names, who used to be the butt of jokes, gay banter and witty repartee.

As an example MFI going into recievership will make null and nonsensical the age old carpenters question:

Q) " Why do you call furniture from MFI, suppositry furniture?"

A) " Because you put it up yourself"

Dennypoos................................just what you need to start the weekend.

It may well be that well known 'bender', Boy George, will be having his intimate circle, (of friends, silly) widened by dint of an expected custodial sentence for illegally imprisoning a 'Male escort'

Seen here doing community service for previous misdemeanours.

Dennypoos........................I tells it likes I see's it.

I know I keep going back to these clips but hey, why not?

Further to my recent re-branding of 'Denny's Diner' to the more upmarket, 'Dennis's Supper Rooms', I may have to amend yet again. Following a mega-successful Lobster Thermidor I feel that a change is due and wish, from this day on to be known as, ' Dennis's Supper Rooms and Seafood Bar'. Possibly the other way round? Not sure as yet.
 The reason for this can be seen in the photograph below:

A word of warning for those purchasing a Lobster from Lidl or Aldi for £4.99. Unless you have the appetite of a mouse, one Lobster will not feed two people.

Lobster seen here with dressed leaves and newish potatoes.

Lobster I can take or leave but the 'Thermidor butter/sauce' was mega.

Dennypoos......................able to eat seriously well when he's not on the piss.

THE PARADOX OF THRIFT.

Should we save or should we spend?

It's gloomy out there. The economy is shrinking, property values are falling and stock markets are in the doldrums.

Many people borrowed heavily during the boom, and now are tempted to pay off debt or save more for a rainy day - something which until now has not characterised the behaviour of UK consumers.

But if this happens, will the government's plan to boost the economy through greater spending work?

Paradox of thrift

Because thrift may be a virtue for the individual, but could damage the economy as a whole, according to the economist John Maynard Keynes, writing in the midst of the Great Depression in the 1930s.

He called it the paradox of thrift. The more people saved, the more they reduced effective demand, thus further slowing the economy.

This was one reason, he pointed out, that a recession can become self-reinforcing.

Keynes also argued that, faced with slowing demand, businesses would not necessarily use the extra savings available in the economy to invest.

In the Keynesian theory, as the slump in demand cascaded through the economy, the resulting slowdown would mean that everyone had less income - ultimately reducing the absolute amount of savings, even if people increase the proportion of their income they put aside.

As unemployment grew, investment would fall, whatever the level of savings.

Government help needed
Sales signs on the High Street
The government has slashed interest rates in a bid to boost spending

But how can we persuade the reluctant consumer to spend, and the reluctant businessman to invest?

Keynes' answer was that it was only the government that could overcome the collective paradox: what was good for the individual would weaken the economy.

This is now the theory being embraced by the chancellor, who has abandoned his fiscal rules for the time being in order to pour money back into the economy.

And cuts in interest rates by the Bank of England are also designed to encourage businesses to continue to invest.

But this is not very effective, because credit markets are in deep freeze. As a result, it is even more important to inject cash into the economy - at least according to Mervyn King, the governor of the Bank of England.

Spectre of deflation

There is another reason why the government wants to give a jolt to the economy now.

It is the fear that prices will actually start to fall as the slowdown gets going.

And deflation - falling prices - would certainly reinforce the paradox of thrift.

If consumers expect prices to drop further in the future, then they have an even stronger incentive to delay their purchases until later, when they can benefit from lower prices.

Deflation, especially in asset prices like houses, can be very long-lasting and hugely damaging to the economy, as recent experience in Japan suggests.

So one reason the government may want to temporarily cut VAT now is to convince people that prices are going to go up later, thus encouraging them to spend.

Rational expectations

Will these measures work?

One reason Keynesian explanations of the economy fell out of favour in the last few decades was the rise of a new economic theory - rational expectations.

This argued that people were aware that any government borrowing would have to be paid back later. As a result they adjust their expectations accordingly, and do not spend as much as predicted.

Since this time, the government will be signalling its intentions to claw back the money it spends in future budgets, perhaps we will all save more to cover our future loss of income.

This theory may well apply to the financial markets, which are making the price of UK debt more expensive on the grounds it is likely to expand dramatically.

But the psychology of individuals may be different.

In the first place, some people may not be able save much whatever their expectations. Money that goes to pensioners surviving on the state pension, for example, may go straight into spending.

And some psychological research suggests that people do not "discount" very effectively in the long term.

So we may be under-estimating the attractiveness of spending even in the midst of a recession.

This, at least, has to be the government's hope as it embarks on its most audacious economic U-turn since Labour came to office in 1997.

Dennypoos.........will be spending like a good 'un when his new credit card arrives.

....It'll take only a few mins.

Following Farquhar's recent post please witness the definitive 'Hard Day's Night'

Dennypooos....................on the ball, even at his age.

I'd almost forgotten about el numero uno Albino, Johnny Winter, till now:

Well it's my birthday so why not.

Dennypoos................summat, summat, etc.

....and I send it back as it's the wrong colour.

Yellow! I ask you.

Dennypoos..................Gas guzzling, perhaps. Tasteful, certainly.

So......

Rather terse instruction from the Christians.